A biblical advice on solving problems with someone.

Today's Gospel puts it almost perfectly on how to solve problems with someone. It takes on four approaches:

First, talk to your "brother", speak, reason and dialogue with him. Settle it between the both of you. If in the end, you and him reason things out, then it is solved!

Second, if step one fails, bring along another person or two, to settle it with him/her. Speak it out, dialogue and reason once more. Hear another person's point-of-view; what more get a person who's wiser and you know has dealt with a problem similar to what you to have.

Third, if approach number two fails, bring it to the community. Community meaning the bigger picture - bring him to court if it comes to that, or round up the groups and circle involved. Sort things out, discuss, and once again dialogue.

Finally if all else fails, "treat him like a pagan or a tax collector." As harsh as it may sound, this means that the problem with this person is beyond help. So what to do if it reaches here? Simple, do like what Jesus did, forgive them (see Luke 18:13), make sure to reason with them and most of all let them know what they are doing is not correct - be sure to justify why,  and above all pray for them. 

The practical guide provided by Jesus can easily be related to; when dealing with a person, it is always wise to reason out on what and why the person did what he did. It's best that problems between people can be solved through understanding, at the smallest point is to always solve it before it gets too large. Furthermore, the four approaches is not necessarily a procedural approach, it can also depend on the gravity of the wrong doing. The most important approach is always to keep in mind to do it with gentleness and respect (1 Peter 3:15).

"Jesus said, ‘If your brother does something wrong, go and have it out with him alone, between your two selves. If he listens to you, you have won back your brother. If he does not listen, take one or two others along with you: the evidence of two or three witnesses is required to sustain any charge. But if he refuses to listen to these, report it to the community; and if he refuses to listen to the community, treat him like a pagan or a tax collector." - Matthew 15:18-17 

A hint of mercy.

"In short, we are called to show mercy because mercy has first been shown to us. Pardoning offences becomes the clearest expression of merciful love, and for us Christians it is an imperative from which we cannot excuse ourselves. At times how hard it seems to forgive! And yet pardon is the instrument placed into our fragile hands to attain serenity of heart. To let go of anger, wrath, violence, and revenge are necessary conditions to living joyfully."

The first line is probably the most special one of all, "because mercy has first been shown to us". The beautiful text taken from Pope Francis' bull on 2016 being the Year of Mercy (you can get it here) is a document proclaiming that next year is a year of understanding but more importantly receiving God's mercy. Because mercy has first been shown to us therefore it is only our right to be merciful and forgiving and having all the Christian values.

But wait!

Isn't this one of the hardest thing to do? To forgive, to understand, to listen, to comprehend, to tolerate and most of all to even love. Too many times, have we preached the word of mercy, but how merciful are we?

Mercy is an act of love, not only love for the other, but it extends as the inherent nature of human. Through mercy is where we experience the basics of human companionship, comfort, and fellowship with one another.

The challenge of mercy sometimes comes at a price; a price that can only be paid with humility and with a feeling of respect for the other person. Most of the time, this challenge arises when we are to show mercy to another person, showing mercy shouldn't be synonymous as a condescending attitude or a "duty" for the sake to care for the person, in fact showing mercy comes from the self offering to and for others so that others might gain from it(see Romans 12:1). Another challenge of mercy is also giving it out to those who need it most. Without going too far - as far as showing mercy to those in poverty and hunger - ask ourselves, who are the people who need mercy from us, in our everyday lives?

Sometimes we overlook this, and we tend to not show the mercy that others crave from us. Now the word "crave" may be strong, but let's reflect, who in our lives do actually crave for it. Another point of view is that sometimes the person who needs mercy from us is our very own self. Self-mercy isn't about pitying ourselves but rather a room we give ourselves to learn from the pain which we ourselves have caused or the pain from which others have given us.

"Perhaps we have long since forgotten how to show and live the way of mercy. The temptation, on the one hand, to focus exclusively on justice made us forget that this is only the first, albeit necessary and indispensable step. But the Church needs to go beyond and strive for a higher and more important goal. On the other hand, sad to say, we must admit that the practice of mercy is waning in the wider culture. In some cases the word seems to have dropped out of use."

Giving what is due.

In this week Sunday's Gospel we read:

"..give back to Caesar what belongs to Caesar - and to God what belongs to God." - Matthew 22: 21

After reading this article,  I can't help to notice that the relationship between this article and that phrase somehow relates.

First let us look who the Prime Minister is. The PM is our elected leader through our democratic system in Malaysia, he is our leader which steers the country to a economically, socially and politically stable nation. The Prime Minister also plays a role in maintaining the peace in our country, moreover he is also the image of Malaysia to the world.

Next, the let's looks at the Archbishop. The Archbishop is the head of the Catholic community here in Kuala Lumpur and acts as the head of the other dioceses also as the Metropolitan. The Archbishop is one of the many successors of the Apostles whom belongs to the college of Bishops. He is our leader in faith, speaking against injustice and the defender of the Catholic faith here in Malaysia, He also is the image of the Catholic Church here in Malaysia.

If you were to read this article you would realise the great differences between what our earthly and civil leader (the PM) had said and what our earthly spiritual leader had said. It may be too early to judge the actions of Archbishop Julian who only took his office for a few weeks as compared to our PM who held it for 6 years already. Nevertheless, through experience and favour, we sometimes wonder if our civil leader has really meant what he said.

As Catholics, Christians, we are to respect both our leaders as what Christ has said. Judging from all that has happened in this country, it is somewhat easy to lose hope and faith in our civil leaders. Sometimes without a doubt we can have anger and even resentment to those whom we have elected to hold office. As what Christ has said by giving back to Caesar what belongs to him, not only this relates to taxes, but also towards the respect we ought to give our civil leaders.

The very same respect we give to God and his workers, as in this case our Archbishop, Priests and those who serve the Lord with their lives.

The frailty of human leadership is that, they will always be judged and always be kept in the limelight, and any crime they do will be criticised and any good they do would also be questioned at times.

By giving to God what belongs to Him and to our leaders what belongs to them means that we should give the respect and honour to what to their due. By no means, should we scowl or to even curse our civil leaders, no matter how bad they are, but rather to pray and have the hope that they might be changed. On another hand, sometimes we too might not like our spiritual leaders. This goes both ways,

When Jesus said to give back what is belonged to the other person, he is saying that everyone deserves the respect and honour according to what their position in the community is, the power they have; it may be contradictory to what they ought to do but nevertheless there's always a reason why they are in that position.

Here's the article from The Ant Daily once again:
http://theantdaily.com/Main/The-moderate-prime-minister-and-the-loving-shepherd

A glimpse of Campus Ministry

The campus ministy. a lay ministry in the Church that covers all universities under the Titular Roman Diocese. In this ministry, we are led by the Bishop himself, followed by the Youth Coordinator and in this case, Father Martin, followed by a Campus Ministry Officer who has his (or her) own team and finally the people of what is called the Penang Diocese Campus Council, a body of students from various universities that make up this council. The council is responsible for ensuring that the Catholic faith is correctly deposited and that students coming from their homes have a platform for students for their Catholic faith.

Last week, for the first time in 4 years, I finally went for a meeting of the PDCC, and I asked myself, why didn't I join before? It was such an interesting journey indeed.

The one thing which caught my attention most was the house below. It doesn't look much but it was called the FM house. A house given by a Priest to the Diocese and now it belonged to the Campus Ministry.

The amazing part about this house is that it is free to use by any campus student, all they have to do is apply to the Campus Ministry. Sadly though, the house was too relaxing that I forgot to take pictures of the inside. 

So what did we do over the weekend?

First of all, we managed to watch two movies: Soul Surfer and Letters to God, two movies that was to show about how much praying and having faith in God matters in our lives.

Secondly, we discussed matters pertaining to the Campus Ministry. Matters like camps, formations and the AGM which would be coming up soon. 

One of the main highlights of the weekend was going to Gurney Paragon. A newly built mall, around the old St. Joseph's novitiate that was ran by the La Salle brothers. It was part of the Catholic history in Malaysia.

What I learned from this meeting amazingly, was the sharing we shared around the dinner table. The problem faced by many students in each campuses. Also another highlight would be Kevin's our Campus Minister, sharing on his journey for the Asian Youth Day. The way he described from seeing the Pope at a very close distance was very enlightening. He described that when he saw the Pope, he had the same kind of joy when holding a child in your hands. He described the Pope was such a joyous man with a constant smile on his face.

Another sharing from Kevin, was the way the Korean Catholics were martyred for their faith. The martyrs were recently canonised by Pope Francis on his visit there. The martyrs were martyred in the 1800s. 

It was an enlightening weekend and I do look forward to the next meeting.

A little shaky picture of our fellowship.

Lastly, the Pope shared this message during one of his public speeches during the AYD and I think it is good for reflection:

"Remember that you are Asian!"

St. Anne's overrated?

27th July 2013- 

The feast of St. Joachim and St. Anne, parents of the blessed Virgin Mary and the grandparents of Jesus Christ. 

One of the most significant Catholic feast days in Malaysia would probably be this feast day; the feast of St. Anne and St. Joachim, but why do I say it is overrated, please note the question mark too. First of all, this is probably (and most likely) the biggest Catholic gathering in Malaysia throughout the year, no other feasts, or festivity can gather as many Catholics and non-Christians to this one place. History has it that the apparition of St. Anne, mother of the Blessed Virgin Mary appeared atop St. Anne hill, and the rest is history. 

Now why would I say it is overrated? 

Thousand, if not tens-of thousands all over South-East Asia flock to this place for the feast of St. Anne and at this time of year all make pledges, deals, devotions and even vow to St. Anne for something. Now I am not going to say it is wrong to do so, but my point is that everyone has created the image that this feast is so momentous that they (I can say I assume) forget the focus of the idea of St. Anne as the grandmother and mediator to Christ Jesus, who we believe is also God the almighty. 

How many go for the feast for a conversion of heart? 

How many go for the feast not for the grandeur but for the devotion made to the Saint?

How many go for the feast in the hope of finding salvation?

Now those are opinionated questions, no specific answers but rather to be answered by one person alone: yourself. This momentous feast plays an impact to many people, but I always wondered, what does the feast bring to the heart, or rather to the eternal soul?

I am not criticizing, I am just curious the great commotion made for this feast that people would actually know what they are doing when going for the feast. Next up, I would really love to know the history of how it came about. 

Last words: Did anyone remember good ol' St. Joachim?

The day you start to die is the day you are born.

Here is a very old post that I have once written before. I thought of sharing it once again.

The day you start to die is the day you are born

I read this post on my Wall on Facebook. It was written by Manvir, a close and good friend.

If you read this phrase at a glance, you will probably try to think hard of it, but after awhile you will just say "Nah!" and probably forget about it. This phrase some how has a very deep meaning. It has an abstract meaning to it which not many will actually ponder on; and I am not saying that I am, I am just saying that this phrase, is food for the soul.

To be born; if you look at a person's life in overall, you would either say that he lived his life or otherwise. When a person lives his life, it means that he had enjoyed his life, he lived a good man, helping others, loving others and of course treasuring life as a something so precious that not even gold can buy.

Die, in this probably doesn't mean literally dying but rather when a person knows that something is going to end like his life, or something that he is enjoying now. To die, is to lose something very dear, something precious. In this case, to die is to live behind the things you treasure most, like your experiences, your knowledge but most of all your loved ones.

The day you start to die is the day you are born is the day where you wake up to reality and face life in the face and realize that life has much more to offer than just to exist on this Earth. When we die we will have an epiphany that we have such a short time on Earth, so why waste it? Why exist when we can live? Why be depressed when we can live life to the fullest?

When we die we get the sudden realization that we have not enjoyed every moment of this life we have. There was once this man, he loved his family a lot but he was also a a man who travels, a man of the business. He was always busy, he was rich, and he never actually had quality time to spend with his family. Then one day, he felt this pain in his chest, he went to get it diagnosed - it was a tumour. He had only 8 months left to live. He was such a shock. Then he took what was meant to be the biggest step of his life, he quit his job. He wasn't afraid, but most of all he wasn't scared to die. His family all cried for him, they mourned his short time on earth, but he said to them, not to mourn, because life is too short- enjoy it, live it. So, in that short months he lived his life to the fullest; he loved deeper, he laughed more, he went bungee jumping, he learnt to ride a horse, he went to pick up ballroom dancing and he started playing the banjo. His last words were, that even though he did not spend enough time with his family, but in these last few months he really did spend quality time with them, and most of all he loved his life and had no regrets.

So that's it. One must cherish life and every moment we have on this earth and not to waste it. Still in a maze about this phrase? Don't worry, it will come to you one day.

Something straight from the Book.

Just last week I attended a camp organised by the Penang Diocesan Campus Ministry, after the closing Mass which was also the Sunday Mass on Saturday evening, a group of us went out to a local 'coffee shop' and hung out. Not long after spending some time togther, Father David Reegan a Capuchin Priest joined us. It was rather interesting and very insightful to have a Capuchin Priest who's "specialty" is the Sacred Scriptures.

My gosh! 

He has the Bible at the tip of his fingers!

Not only he can quote it rather well, but he can explain it thoroughly and the meaning behind it.

For example during his sermon Fr. Reegan explained briefly the Gospel on that Sunday, it was the Gospel of John chapter 21. Jesus asked Peter three times "Do you love me?", to that Peter answered "You know that I love you" three times too; well Fr. Reegan taught us a whole new thing: that when Peter said love it was actually "like". The "like" meaning that Peter cannot love as how Jesus did and that was the love of "agape" a Greek word meaning unconditional love. So, Peter who was the man who Jesus asked to look after his sheep, himself couldn't love Jesus full-heartedly because he was afraid and also a man.

Well, during the "makan" session with him, a friend of mine from another university asked Father, how can we make our Catholic gatherings sustainable and another also asked how do we make our Catholic societies a little more stronger.

To that Fr. DR said this verse from the Bible:

Acts 2:42

It was a simple as that he said. The one thing that all Catholic societies or bodies need to do in order to last and to be established is:

1. Follow the teachings of the Apostles (and also the Church. Learning and sharing together about stuff like faith-knowledge, social issues and perhaps also Catholic living)
2. Fellowship (as in "makan-makan" together, hanging out)
3. Breaking of Bread (attending Mass)
4. Prayer (speaking to God)

He continued, just do this four things and the result is, well, look at the Church now; lasting over hundreds of centuries.

A simple advice and a deep and well needed one.

Thanks Father DR, it gave me some time to think about my own Catholic Society.

Check out:

the paragraph of the Bible verse here and also check out Lumen Gentium (a Vatican II document) paragraph 13.